Email Etiquette!

Well to begin with I am no great personality to define any etiquette and i do not intend doing a definition. But I think as a person who responds to my emails pretty regularly I am well qualified to "talk" about email etiquette.

Email was a great communication revolution in the late 20th century. Emails are easier to send and receive than the postal mails, 'coz they save writing time - of course typing out is easier than writing, searching and finding an envelope, stamping and walking to the post office or mail box to send it. Then waiting for the mail to reach the person sent and to hear back. When we get a reply in the post, how happy and good it used to feel? I do lament the invention of email some times 'coz it feels great to read the written letter from a loved one and the family. From anybody for that matter. Every letter has a spirit to it. Well that apart -

Email, when we do send them we intend communication. Can communication always be one way? How would it feel if we call a person on the phone and start yapping and the other person never even says an umm or ah? What kind of communication is that? I think un reciprocated emails work the same way as unresponsive calls.

I for one expect an acknowledgment or reply to my question whenever I send an email to my friends and family. But there are many people in the world who do not acknowledge or respond to emails. What might be their thought process? I wonder if people are too busy that they do not have time to hit the reply button and type out a few nice words or thank you or a response to a question? Oh no but what about the ones who send them? Those kind of people do put me off, I never want to communicate with them.

Wouldn't it be nice if the world responds to emails? I do not mean junk mails of course. Real genuine mails from people you know, who had sent you information and are waiting to know if you find them useful? I feel every intentional emails with a wish, communication or information we need should get a response. Well only I seem to feel that way. But never mind I am at peace 'coz I do that always!

தேடல்

நுரைத்து தள்ளி கரையில் புரண்டு
என்ன தேடும் இந்த அலைகள்?
தொலைத்து விட்ட நுரையின் காற்றா
எடுத்து சென்ற மணலின் சுவடா
கரைத்து கொண்ட காலத்தின் கனவா

பறந்து கரைந்து திரியும் காகம்
தேடித்திரியும் காரணம் என்ன?
சின்னகுழந்தை ஆனால் கூட
அம்மா பார்க்க தேடல் உண்டு

இந்த
தொலைந்து போன மனிதம் மட்டும்
தொலைந்த நினைவே மறந்து போய்...

அவள்(ன்)

மின்னல் பெண்மை கண்ணை பறிக்க
கன்னல் இனிமை குரலில் தெறிக்க
அன்ன நடையை அழகாய் பயின்று
சின்ன மனதை கிறங்க வைத்தாள்

பதுமை வந்த அழகை பார்த்து
மெதுவாய் பின்னே சென்ற கூட்டம்
பதறி ஓடும் காரணம் என்ன?
பாவம் "அவளின்" பிறவி தானா?

Visit.

Living in California, We do not get many visitors from back home. Many childhood relationships long lost, we do live a happy content life as any foursome family. Except some pangs of regrets when we see children playing with visiting grandparents in the local park or when our children visit friend's who have their grandparents visiting them for a six months stay. Somehow getting our children's grandparents visit us is always been an alluring enigma.

So now when our cousin had to come to bay area on work from Chennai and stayed with us for 2 months, it was like a rare surprise gift. It was like walking down the memory lane, densely fogged with clusters of emotions. Remembering and discovering the tastes, sharing memories and revisiting common interests, like books and history. Children had a fun playmate and a knowledgeable chithappa - all in one.

But time's winged chariot does fly fast when you are having so much fun. The visit ended and he started to get back to his work, life and family today. We roam around the home like zombies. My little two and half year old is still calling for "chithappa". Older one is bravely trying to hide his disappointment.

Having family live in the US doesn't help a lot sometimes. We do have our family on the other coast and meet rarely and only in India when we both visit. Perhaps defining once a year visits with family on the other coast will give these relatives deprived children a better idea of family and relationships? Like alternating visits every year?

ஒரு மழை நாள்

தூறல் மெல்ல சாரல் அடிக்க
ஈர மேகம் மெதுவாய் நடக்க
இடையில் தவழும் வெளிச்சக்கோடு
வண்ணதூரிகை வானவில்லாய்

வளைந்து செல்லும் கழுவிய சாலை
மின்னும் வண்ண எண்ணைக் கோலம்
நெஞ்சில் நிறைக்கும் கடந்த காலம்
வானவில்லின் வண்ணசிதறல்..

Some random thoughts...

Just the situation I heard about kept my thoughts rolling... The abundance of words - lipservice in all is amazing. And the real care, true feelings shown and those who cared- "cared" as in those who takes the extra mile to help, make them happy or indulge are simply forgotten. 

Is the world becoming a soceity purely based on convenience and selfishness? Or does the pep talk carry more value than the real? Just like the puffed up resume working wonders where as the real resume is thrown under?

Is today's world has become so very materialistic that there is no place for honesty and truth between friends and family? Just thinking about the amount of back stabbing and sidestepping (is there an expression like that?-sidestepping? ha - what funny term, but I'm gonna keep it here :) to mean silent withdrawal from any kind of relationship). 

So how should a person be if he wants to remain sane and honest and still maintain good relationship with world at large? Well a little tricky 'coz of the word "honest". 

"Trip to India - Going home and not finding it" - Indira Anupindi

Just finished reading this book - I am still thinking of a word to label this - may be scary? no doesn't sound right. Can I say very intriguing book of a person's visit to India after five years and getting completely disillusioned? I read it. Read it as I always do, cover to cover, front to back.

The author - Indira Anupindi seems extremely matter of fact - she doesn't sit on judgement. She is just stating the facts of today's urban India. The statement is so simple that its a slap on the face for those of us who were used to a culture with decorum. The information shakes the very root of my faith in Indian culture. Being an Indian girl born and brought up with a clear, simple set of rules, instructions and faith, I am heartbroken at the unnerving reality.

I would call the portrayal of this India in the book as India in it's extreme. We have poverty, filth and hunger right at the doorsteps of posh finenesse. Its a combination of the blind faith in following the age old custom where the Indian window is stripped of colors and bangles, as well as where Urban, rich "social" Indian women (not just young mindless girls mind you, these are mothers, mother-in-laws of rich soceity) is finding peace in "gigolos". To be honest - naive that I am this is the first time I come across such a word. But apparently gigolo means the male version of prostitute. The cultural decay is shocking beyond comapare.

The poignant descriptions of how "soceity" women entertain themselves, expensive way they hold their kitty parties, even the simple Rs. 800( the most inexpensive, by Indian standards) are making me revisit my plans of eventually getting back to India for good someday. The subtlity with which she portrays the casual spending habits or today's Indians in India and today's Indians in America is so cool.

I only wish the autor had added some magnificient pictures to match her descriptions of places like Vaishnav Devi temple and Manthralaya. Some aspects apart, definitly a good read for many of us so out of touch with the latest "developments" in India - I only wish these developments are only fiction, rather than the horrid reality it seems to be.